One faithful day, he called me and demanded to talk to me about something, I asked him to come online so we can chat .
To my greatest surprise, he brought the issue of family coming to live with us, he said anybody from his family should be free to visit anytime and free to stay as they want.
I told him I had always lived with crowd all my life and I hated it. He should please see reasons with me, I am not saying no one can visit but they can’t just bump in anytime they like, I asked him if I don’t have a say in our home, we were on that for some days and when I saw it was not leading us anywhere, I decided to agree to his terms but he continued ” you should know now and know what you want so it won’t be like I have turned you into a robot” he said. I replied, ” that is exactly what you have turned me into since you have the final say, but no problem I will do as you have said. But he kept pushing the issue, he said I needed to know all these things because I will see worse in marriage and if he has so turned me into a robot with just this small issue, its means I can’t stand him in marriage, that I will be crying consistently and at the end file for a divorce.
What? Are these words coming out from Daniel? My whole system immediately shut down, I cried and got tired of crying, those words of his pierced my heart, so you don’t even believe our marriage can work and you are telling me how much I will cry in marriage? Those were the questions I kept asking myself. I immediately went offline as there was nothing more to discuss.
He stopped calling me for weeks and I couldn’t call because his phone was having battery issue and most times his number is always not reachable except he charges his phone and immediately calls me.
I pondered over everything for weeks and decided to end the relationship as he actually wanted because that was what he wanted, hence those heart breaking words. I sent a message to his messenger on facebook that I am backing out from the relationship and he should look for a girl wired to fulfill destiny with him as I wasn’t the girl, he accepted happily and that was the end.
We finally broke up 23rd June 2017. It was heart breaking but it was for the best, it took me years to bounce back and became fine again. Ever since the break up, I have spoken to him just twice. I later undertood he has attitude problem, like he wants to control everything about one and that was same issue he had with his ex girl but unlike his ex girl, I was calm while she was not as she likes challenging or questioning his attitudes. He is now married but there is a but, I am not happy about the but, but I am only happy I am not part of the but in his marriage.
HOW I HANDLED IT
I quited the relationship as I became afraid of what he propose as what I will be seeing in marriage with him.
MY ADVISE
We all can actually pick different things from the story, but here is what I have to say and what you should do before walking down the aisle.
1)If your partner breaks up from a relationship before meeting you, please find out why.
2) Ask yourself if both of you thinks towards same direction.
3) Does your spouse see you the way you see them?
2) Watch for the red signals.
3) Don’t compromise your peace for anything, if it’s not working, be sure to know it’s not working, please leave while you can if you know you can’t take it.
Now let’s talk,
1) Was Rose disobedient?
2) What would Daniel have done when Rose stated her reason for not going on a Friday?
3) Do you think Daniel still wanted the relationship?
4) Should Rose have stayed to make her relationship work?
5) Please, advise the readers.